Feeling the feelings

When we feel something that doesn’t sit right with us, we may feel angry, upset, frustrated that we feel that feeling. Damn this sadness/ anxiety/ anger/ fear/ confusion!

But it is telling us something, perhaps that we are moving past something or have not yet worked through something. It is a signal to us that there’s a shift taking place or about to take place. Yet, the more we push it away or numb it the more it looms and grows within us, feeling like a shaken up bottle about to pop. And when it pops there can be a flurry of pent up words or unwanted actions unravelling before we even have a chance to screw the lid back on.

But, perhaps we need to sit in the comfort that whatever we are feeling, there is a signal behind it. For example, our anger can be telling us something.

 “Anger is the firestorm that signals the death of our old life. Anger is the fuel that propels us into our new one. Anger is a tool, not a master. Anger is meant to be tapped into and drawn upon. Used properly, anger is use-full. Anger is our friend. Not a nice friend. Not a gentle friend. But a very, very loyal friend. It will always tell us when we have been betrayed. It will tell us when we have betrayed ourselves. It will always tell us that it is time to act in our own best interests. Anger is not the action itself. It is actions invitation.”- Julia Cameron

I used to find it difficult to know how to express my feelings but over the last few years it has become more fluid, easier and less contained. With a solid support network and through the work that I do, it is really important that I can walk the talk and be in touch with what is going on for me before I can sit in somebody else’s world and serve them.

I now ask each feeling what it is telling me and usually the answer is sitting right there, with a bit of gentle questioning I can go back to the source and understand and accept that whatever I am feeling is okay.